September 14, 2020
It seemed like hours, quite honestly, that he was staring at the screen. He’s read this quite a few times now and yet he can’t seem to process it. At this point Glen had given up trying to understand and instead favored the option of staring aimlessly at the passage as if that would help his case.
Why is this so difficult?!
His teacher had assigned passages to read for the whole class with a quiz on it the next day, it wasn’t supposed to be so complicated! After all, the rest of the students never struggled with understanding the content, so why was it just him?
Why can’t I just get it right? Why am I having such a hard time with this?
Glen liked to consider himself smart, but the teachers didn’t exactly agree with that statement. He always struggled with the material that they gave him, material that they gave everyone else.
Why can’t I be like the other students?
It’s always the same thing, the same kind of assignments and standardized testing. The same thing always happened, Glen would struggle with the material and he would fail the given assessment. He would be made to memorize and recite but he could never remember what he needed to.
What was it again? No, no it wasn’t that… dang it why can’t I remember? I’ve been over this a thousand times now!
It was a cycle that kept on repeating itself, all throughout his school years, it kept on repeating. He was sick of it all! All of the required testing and assessments, the passages he had to memorize and recite. It was tiring to deal with the same system everyday, to stare at a passage for what seemed like forever to try and understand.
Another one… this is going to take a while. Why does it have to be another passage! None of this makes any sense!
He always felt alone in this, in the system. None of the other students really expressed or revealed their struggles, if they had any, they did what they were told. Studied what they had to in order to pass the class and to pass the year. He’s the only one that just can’t grasp the information, the only one that seems to struggle.
Why am I the only one?
He knows that’s not true though, he’s not the only one. His friend, Jasmin who he doesn’t share classes with this year, is constantly studying and never seems to take a break.
“It’s hard to understand the content, I get that. Why do you think I’m always busy? I have tutors but even they don’t help all that much… it’s just constant studying for me, at least until I finally get it”.
They don’t understand either…
The teachers don’t seem to see the problem, they just give them task after task saying the same thing, that it’s required for them to complete it all in order to succeed.
It’s always the same, always a cycle. It never changes.
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